Queen Josh (and all other Holleran admirers), I would love to resurrect this discussion. I just joined about a month ago, so I was not "here" when you first posted. Andrew Holleran (aka Eric Garber) is one of my all-time favorite writers. I feel much the same about DFTD as you. I first read it in 1992 and it was like nothing I had ever read before. I was possessed by it. I picked it up again last year and it still had the same power over me. ["Americans, for my money, are just too damned sophisticated." -Sutherland.]
I liked Nights in Aruba, but not quite as much, probably because I so loved the mostly east village setting of DFTD. Since then, I have read his others and all were just as great (different, quieter, but just as great): Ground Zero, Beauty of Men, In September, the Light Changes (this will blow you away it is so good--esp. the story "Joshua and Clark" which completely nuked me it was that good and that heartbreaking) and Grief.
So, please, if you (or anyone else) are still interested in talking about him, you have my ear.
Another one to consider if you haven't already: Alan Hollinghurst's The Line of Beauty, but that's another thread.