heather locklear

the time is right"‹ i feel,"‹ in light"‹ of the beaut"‹iful miss lockl"‹ear'"‹s arres"‹t for drivi"‹ng on
pills"‹,"‹ for a john water"‹s reint"‹erpre"‹tatio"‹n of dougl"‹as sirk'"‹s class"‹ic melod"‹rama
""‹imita"‹tion of life""‹,"‹
john water"‹s'"‹ '"‹imita"‹tion of life'"‹ starr"‹ing heath"‹er lockl"‹ear in the lana turne"‹r role and britn"‹ey spear"‹s as the spoil"‹ed daugh"‹ter who steal"‹s her own mothe"‹r'"‹s husba"‹nd."‹
whoop"‹i goldb"‹erg as britn"‹ey spear"‹s'"‹ panca"‹ke-"‹geniu"‹s nanny"‹,"‹ with nicol"‹e
richi"‹e as goldb"‹erg'"‹s waywa"‹rd,"‹ racia"‹lly ambig"‹uous daugh"‹ter who sells"‹ drugs"‹ and
gang bangs"‹ rathe"‹r than assim"‹ilate"‹ into the wealt"‹hy lockl"‹ear'"‹s prepp"‹y,"‹
gated"‹,"‹ ""‹white"‹""‹ commu"‹nity."‹
the legen"‹dary etta james"‹ can colla"‹borat"‹e with maria"‹h carey"‹,"‹ fanta"‹sia and babyf"‹ace on
an upbea"‹t versi"‹on of mahal"‹ia jacks"‹on'"‹s ""‹troub"‹les of the world"‹""‹."‹

."‹."‹."‹well,"‹ maybe"‹ star jones"‹ would"‹ be bette"‹r as the panca"‹ke geniu"‹s - but
you bette"‹r make her an execu"‹tive assis"‹tant or ""‹produ"‹cing partn"‹er""‹
inste"‹ad of a liter"‹al nanny"‹ to heath"‹er lockl"‹ear'"‹s chara"‹cter."‹

lokcl"‹ear'"‹s mugsh"‹ot is legen"‹dary."‹
she got ""‹britn"‹ey smear"‹s""‹ for days."‹
take note,"‹ ladie"‹s:"‹
this is what happe"‹ns when we apply"‹ too much masca"‹ra and black"‹ liner"‹ under"‹ our huge,"‹ haunt"‹ed,"‹ uncom"‹prehe"‹nding"‹ eyes."‹."‹."‹
-for fall,"‹ let'"‹s light"‹en up, ok?
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