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I love these girls and want to rescue them from the "Crap TV" thread. I've never had a job either, and would love to find out how to make money like a normal person!

To achieve my education, studied the out-takes last night from the "Simple Life" DVD with Jackie. Watching Princesses try to wash a pack of five bull-terriers in twenty minutes, and clean out their anal glands - who knew how hard it was? Or even that such a task existed, to be paid for? Jackie & I had to Google 'anal glands,' and learned so much.

Jackie observed that the girls are in truth Radical Faeries: a wakening social conscience in gaudy fluffy outfits, the excessive favouring of pink & glitter, and the attempt to fit in, however poorly, with the real world, all the while tap-dancing, singing, putting on mascara and losing things. Then when you get in trouble, you bat your eyelashes, give the finger and fall down giggling. Then everyone loves you and you kiss everyone.

Loved her telling some yokel at Sonic fast-food joint that she and Nicole were the "Sonic Sisters" and owned the Sonic chain. Very faerie.

When Paris asks "What's a tail-gate?" then has to kick one open with her $600. Gucci pumps I feel that something violent has been done to the status quo.

They should be invited to a Radical Faerie camp to bone up on their anarchic techniques, and be enjoined to donate their excess wardrobe to the Goat Boutique.

Even though Paris can pay for just about anything, including a TV network, her being on this show does prove that she & her friend might like to "find out" what ARE those things that money can't buy?! However staged it is.

Next she has to learn to spend her money like Terry Southern's "Magic Christian." Again, show up in some small town and buy everyone tons of stuff - both things they need like college educations, and things they don't need - like pink tutus for cows, or a radio station that only plays music she & Nicole approve of - and then disappear, leaving everyone to fall down, give them the finger and giggle.
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They so damn cute together. Hot chicks that are dumber than a box of rocks. It can't get any hotter than that.
Just think, Paris is going to one day split the fortune of the Hilton hotels with her sister.
And Nicole, well the least I can say is that her mother beat her fathers ass. That's one for the book's.
I do think that these two get a bad rap alot but they haven't shown any evil. I actually felt bad for Hilton during her recent video scandal.

Ritchie, I believe has even better things to come. Her character and the fact that she is Biracial will appeal to many in this country. Hally Berry, Lenny Kravitz, Derick Jeter and now Nichole as well as countless others. They may be the truest of what this country stands for. Or should.
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I turned to my boyfriend at Studio Six (an Atlantic City gay bar that was taken over by a twenty- something bi birthday party)after looking at several girls in strappy sandals and skimpy gauzy knock off dresses(in sub zero weather) and said this is what Carrie Bradshaw and Paris Hilton have wrought. Actually, I liked it, at least they bothered to try.
(Paris is cool but Carrie is better.)
Nicole is the rowdy sub who misbehaves for Domme Paris' pleasure. She knows it amuses her Queen enormously to see her buffoonery. Whatever scrapes they get into, Nicole always behaves worse and takes it to another level of insanity. When she makes Paris laugh at something she's done, she's accomplished her goal in life.

I hope at least they're making it with each other.

Next episode: They try out being a Domme-and-sub team for one night at Manhattan's famed Whipshack. Even better: an entire SEASON of them at the Shack.
Once again they have to try to earn a living!
WHY do we find this so wonderfully sick and amusing?
They made $10 babysitting and Nicole goes, "That will buy me ONE nail." As in nail salon...

Got VERY excited seeing them go-go/hoochie dancing on a bar at the end of the show. I thought, At Last! They're discovering SEX WORK! But no. I didn't see them collect ONE tip! JC! Someone's gotta teach them to cash in on the goods.

SO: Paris as a Domme, but now I think Nicole would make a great Switch. With the client watching from his corner, Paris will tie up Nicole, who will scream and fight. Then she could get loose... and they could BOTH beat up on the client... that I've got booked for them... as we speak. THAT should keep them in gas for a few days, not to mention a whole manicure.
Actually I was shocked -- SHOCKED -- when someone told me recently that Nicole Ritchie was a biracial "high yella" like myself. (I never connected her last name Ritchie to Lionel Ritchie). Normally I can spot my own kind pretty easily, but Miss Ritchie totally passes. Never would've guessed. I wonder what my black buddies from high school who used to call me Casper the Friendly Ghost would say.
Though bi-recial, she's adopted by Ritchie, so she isn't his offspring. He and his wife 'found' her performing ( I forget whose stage act it was but it was someone prominent) when she was, like, only eight or something like that. Ritchie was kind of apalled that when he asked about her and who she was no one really wanted to claim her, she was like a parentless waif.
I heard she was bastard child of Lionel Richies drummer or smth. Sheila E's brother infact.

I actually think she's really funny, on the edge though, like she could go all Courtney any day... but if u watch that Road Trip show she is has a real acid humor. Paris is just so bland to me like a empty shell of a doll... all painted and doll like but just empty vacant eyes/stare ...
Nichole was over the edge as a heroin habitue. So its just a matter of time before she slips back, if she doesn't already have a toe in to it now. Her humor is actually snide most the time. Like I said here earlier, they are like two 16 year old BOYS. Hilton I think is already down on this show, she is slightly embarrassed by Ritchie now, its easy to read on her. She's really hoping for a legitimate acting gig and this show is just too adolescent for her now. I think she is tired of Ritchie but of course caught in a contract. It would be most interesting if the series ended with them not even talking to each other anymore.

Hollywood News > Paris Hilton gets all bruised and battered!:

New York, July 31 (ANI):

All doesn't seems to be going well with Paris Hilton these days.

Soon after she split with beau Nick Carter, the hotel heiress has been snapped with visible bruises on her face and arms.

A report in E-Online says that the bruises are reportedly outcomes of a squabble and adds that Paris's reps are tight lipped about the injuries.

"Paris' friends and family want her to go to the police and press charges against the person responsible, but Paris hasn't yet made up her mind," E-Online's columnist Ted Casablanca was quoted as saying, in the report
Stephen Fry the British actor (Jeeves and Whooster/ Wilde etc) was recently quoted re Paris Hilton - "It takes a startling vanity, and enormous lack of self-knowledge and a huge amount of greed and desire to be like Paris...why should anyone care about this trashy worthless human being" Bravo ole chap..
Still great tabloid fodder!! LOL
She is to American society now like what her tiny pooch is to her, and that is like what the dwarf court jester used to be to the royals. In fact the description of her character you quote Anna, really amounts to saying Paris Hilton is a developmental dwarf. Under the heat of her gargantuanly priviledged life and way too much media her personality never had a chance to be anything but stunted. As proof of this: her 'memoir' is being published this month - it is all of 129 pages long! At least one society gets it right, in the English press she is referred to as a "Z lister." And you're right, at least she will endlessly be topping off the tabloid tank for the rest of her life with bits about which skanky rock star boinked her, etc. etc. It makes a good placemat to drop lunch crumbs on.
There always seems to 'have to be' some blonde woman in the forefront of the media that everyone can sling garbage at. It's almost like a unofficial sport. It started with Marilyn Monroe... Madonna/Whore complex is such a fun sandbox to play and piss in. Look at her body, look at her tits, trash her, her mind, what she has (Paris, tons of cash) what she doesn't have (Marilyn, lost her husband and career through boozing)... she becomes everyone's plaything/media fodder and it's such a blast to trample on her.

The women might start out with some kind of legitimate agenda: acting, artistry, activism, but as soon as the media lights shine bright, they turn into dog food for the barking masses.

I was just reading about Jean Seberg again, and how her life was ruined by admitted FBI media plants. In her case, it was her political activism that got her trashed.

Still, she was a pretty blonde "artiste" and for some reason this vision brings out some of the worst in people. What are they supposed to do, or be, in order to make everyone pleased with them?
Not be human? Not have flaws? The venom that comes through because they're not perfect is asinine. They are not supposed to be perfect. They are neither madonnas nor whores.

In Jean Seberg's case, she had the right to be other than 'just an actress' and try to help the Indians, civil rights causes, etc.

Look at her bio and the newspaper articles.

Also the FBI report and the fake letter they sent to the newspapers:

The FBI 'leaked' that she was with child with a Black Panther baby, which put her into shock, caused her to miscarry, and destroyed her peace of mind. Every year thereafter on the anniversary of her child's death she made a suicide attempt. Finally she succeeded killing herself at age 40.

All I am saying is do not underestimate the power of trash media and vindictive gossip on a person's psyche, and don't add to it.
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My esoteric ex-boyfriend on the west coast had this to say recently about the Paris Hilton phenomenon, and I agree:

I've seen a few of Traci Lord's legit. tv appearances and she sure seems like a better actress (and more attractive) than the arguably brain dead Paris Hilton.
Why can't Traci or Jenna Jameson get work and yet Paris is in demand (not for anything of
any artistic value I admit)

Paris Hilton is in demand because young women want to *be* her. her "heiress" mystique is real. she did porn for kicks, not because she needed the money.

traci lords is fierce, but she seems hard, used up. and few smart, modern young girls really want to *be* jenna jameson. Her aesthetics are too cracked-out and she remains "socially" beyond beyond the pale.

Paris Hilton represents to young girls the fantasy of looking and even *behaving* like a porn star, yet magically retaining the status of a "good girl" and the independence of a "princess".

Young people today may be trending toward the wanton and exhibitionistic, but they are simultaneously snobby and elitist.
today, for young people world wide, "status" is a kind of porn in itself.

Paris Hilton is modeling a national wish-fulfilment trip. don't forget that miss hilton follows (probably quite consciously) in the steps of celebrity heiresses like barbara hutton, who scandalized the tabloids with her marriages and active, varied sex life.
the hilton sisters are related at least by marriage to both elizabeth taylor and zsa zsa gabor. miss hilton's aunt is the beautiful kim richards, from "escape to witch mountain" and "nanny and the professor". the public responds to paris hilton atavistically.
she was born to play the mythic, untouchable sex goddess role on and off the screen.

the fact is, many of miss hilton's fans have sex tapes of their own. everyone's got a camera in their bedroom! In the 90s, madonna, la toya jackson and pamela anderson set the explicit example for miss hilton. if paris hadn't done it, somebody else would have done it.
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She's hideous, but like Madonna I think she represents a much bigger thing. When Madonna (or as we affectionately call her around here, "The Evil One") was coming up everyone hated her of course but we all made the mistake of dimissing her. We all failed to see that she, like Bob Dylan, was the signpost for her generation. I guess we were all under the impression that culture and society would always be on an "upward" path. That the world would get better and better, more enlightened with each passing generation. Oh youth! Boy were we wrong. I see now that things can just as easily go in the other direction. Yes, I know there have always been "Barbara Huttons" etc. but Paris Hilton is something much more terrifying. She grew up on Madonna. She is her spawn. She is everything that the Islamic fundamentalists say that WE are.


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Did anyone see this week's South Park? Totally made fun of Paris for being a stupid whore (the show's words)! My favorite part was when her dog Tinkerbelle blew his brains out in the back of her limo. And when Paris plants a pineapple firmly into her cooter! Perhaps the rest of the world is finally catching on. A must-see for any Paris "fan"! weed
On the next episode, Paris will be devoured by a pack of Tinkerbelles who will strip her to the bone. Her skeleton will be so pleased with her new figure she'll help develop a whole new line of clothing for teenage anorexics. Her chain of salons with hungry Tinkerbelles on staff to eat up teenage pudge will do poorly, however.
She got the Lazy Eye Special from Dr. Tuck. It's offered every Thursday after 4:30PM. They even take second hand ice as payment and have doggycare on-site. You even get ten percent off on your first six month tune-up. Dr. Tuck has kept Phyllis Diller looking 80 for the last fifty years. He's the go-to person in Beverly Hills.

Oops. Sorry Paris, but the latest ABC teevee poll shows that when asked, 86 percent questioned said, "Paris Hilton does not matter."
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i have to hand it to Nicole Richie... really.. don't know if u read all the tacky mags but Nicole is appearing allot lately lookin well styled - defo not skanky... they tried to do that to Paris which i think she kept to for one day...but Nicole I do believe has managed to move a bit from the skank image.. I defo think Nicole is here to stay (in the media that is) while Paris will end up like that tacky ole slag Angeline (?) paying for her own billboards above Sunset blvd
Posted on Jun 3, 2006

By Andy Borowitz

One day after hotel heiress Paris Hilton announced that she is recording her debut album as a singer, Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad said that his country was attempting to obtain an early copy of the record but claimed Iran would use it only for "peaceful purposes."

For Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice, who this week has been attempting to engage Iran in a conversation about its nuclear program, the news that the Iranians were trying to obtain Ms. Hilton's debut album was a serious foreign policy setback.

"We regard any attempt by Iran to obtain Paris Hilton's album as a threat to the region, and we will not sit idly by while that happens," Secretary Rice said at a press conference in Washington today.

But in an emergency meeting of the United Nations Security Council, the ambassador from Great Britain warned that aerial photos taken by a spy satellite indicated that bootlegged copies of Paris Hilton's album have already been smuggled into Iran and may be on the verge of being enriched and weaponized.

Mr. Annan said that if attached to the tip of a long-range missile, Paris Hilton's new album could threaten not just the Middle East but parts of Europe as well.

"This is the most serious threat to world peace since North Korea obtained an early DVD of ˜Gigli,'" Mr. Annan said.

Elsewhere, one day after the Dixie Chicks' latest album reached No. 1 on the pop and country charts, President Bush named all three members of the group to the Axis of Evil.
Paris has a nervous breakdown and gets out of doing jail time. Instead she has to stay in her multi million dollar mansion for forty days. Boo hoo. Just another example of how the rich in this country get special treatment and the poor get nothing. Can you imagine if you or I were sentenced to jail time and we claimed it was causing us anxiety and rattled nerves? I hope someone makes a huge legal stink about this and that the judges and police are held responsible for this outrage.

I do not doubt that she really is having a nervous breakdown. Yesterday the sheriff who had let her out (after the 3 days) said she had been on some kind of psychoactive meds (Zoloft?) and not having her pills in jail (why not?) made her lose it.

The pic of her crying in the back of a car was pitiable. The media rushing after her in a feeding frenzy... She is a mess and probably now belongs in a mental hospital, not a jail.

Politicians all over the country are calling to
throw the book at her, make her an example... like the cases of Leona Helmsley and Martha Stewart. But like them, at this point all that money is not helping her. She is too young and silly to take it on the lip (hip?) like Leona and Martha, and just do her time.

Being that famous in this day and age must be horrific. As I said in a post a little earlier here, being the Big Blonde in America is the shits. I think the crack-up is real and people should stop baiting, hating her and making fun of her.

...out of curiosity I went back to read the first post on this thread... it was by me, and I have to say we really had NO IDEA it could get this awful...

"Jackie observed that the girls [Paris & Nicole] are in truth Radical Faeries: a wakening social conscience in gaudy fluffy outfits, the excessive favouring of pink & glitter, and the attempt to fit in, however poorly, with the real world, all the while tap-dancing, singing, putting on mascara and losing things.

"Then when you get in trouble, you bat your eyelashes, give the finger and fall down giggling. Then everyone loves you and you kiss everyone."

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And if our parents or friends or contemporaries do not give us the guidence we need to get along in this world, then who will. Is it only when we have not developed a sense of social conscience and humility that the world will show us where we have erred? Did she not have even a small clue that if you are charged with drunk driving and you don't do everything required by the law to pay your debt to society that they will so often come for you? I think she is the product of both a rich entitled high society and a younger generation of snotty brats who think they can do as they please without any responsibilities to anyone. It will be interesting to see what justice is meted out to Nicole Ritchie when she goes to court next month charged with reckless drunk driving and possession of drugs earlier this year. I feel sorry for anyone who has to be locked up to get the picture about their bad behavior. Maybe this will be the one example in her life where she has to learn the hard way that life is what we make it and there is no one but ourselves to blame for what happens to us in this life.

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